Letting go of the monkey to change old habits.
There’s a moment in every inner journey when we realize we are not fighting the world — we are wrestling with ourselves. The habits that cling to us, the fears that whisper at night, the impulses that seem to “just happen” — all of these are echoes of old beliefs we’ve repeated so often that they’ve become second nature.
Seth often reminded us that “You create your own reality — not once, but continuously.” That means habits, addictions, and self-sabotaging patterns are not enemies that attack us from outside; they are realities we keep recreating from within. Each thought, each emotional repetition, renews the same script — and the “monkey on your shoulder” is just a vivid symbol for that ongoing inner playback.
The monkey’s whispers — “You can’t change,” “You’ll fall back,” “Just one more time” — are nothing more than the echoes of yesterday’s beliefs still vibrating in your mind. Seth taught that these inner voices are not demons or curses, but fragments of ourselves that believe they are protecting us. They repeat familiar pain because they mistake it for safety.
To move beyond them, we don’t need to wage war on the monkey. We need to change our relationship to it. Seth said that any pattern can be transformed the moment we stop identifying with it — the instant we realize “I am not my habit. I am the consciousness that chooses.”
Awareness dissolves fear. The moment you look at that inner monkey with calm, curious eyes — not anger or guilt — it loses its power. In Seth’s words, “You change not by killing the old self, but by expanding beyond it.” You stop feeding the monkey bananas of guilt, stress, and self-pity, and instead nourish your deeper self with understanding, imagination, and self-respect.
The monkey will still whisper now and then. It may remind you of the old comfort, the familiar escape. But now you can smile and say, “Thank you for the reminder — but I live differently now.”
That’s the true freedom Seth pointed toward: not the absence of the past, but the conscious choice of the present. You are not trapped in yesterday’s momentum unless you decide to be. The old habits, the old fears, the whispering monkey — all fade the moment you remember who’s really holding the leash of your reality.
In the end, it isn’t about silencing the monkey. It’s about remembering that the monkey was never in charge.
🐒 The Monkey on Your Shoulder (unknown)
They say everyone who’s ever battled an addiction — whether it’s alcohol, nicotine, gambling, or anything else that hijacks the brain — carries a little monkey on their shoulder. Not a cute, cartoon monkey with a tiny fez and cymbals, but a sly, whispering one. The kind that remembers exactly what buttons to press, what tone to use, and when your defences are just a little low.
That monkey doesn’t disappear the day you quit. It doesn’t pack its bags and catch the next train out of town. It simply settles down and gets quieter… waiting. Sometimes, it’ll sit there peacefully, half asleep, letting you get on with your life. But it’s always there, watching for an opening — a stressful day, a lonely evening, a moment of nostalgia — to whisper:
“Hey… remember how good it felt?”
That’s the monkey’s trick. It doesn’t shout. It suggests. It doesn’t argue with logic; it plays with emotion. And it’s remarkably patient. It doesn’t care if it has to wait a week, a month, or ten years — it knows that one moment of weakness is all it takes to climb back in and start pulling the strings again.
But here’s the power shift — the moment you realise that the monkey’s voice doesn’t control you. It can talk all it wants, but you decide whether to listen. You don’t have to fight it, yell at it, or panic when it shows up. In fact, the more you calmly acknowledge it — “Ah, there you are, old friend” — the weaker it gets. Awareness starves it. Panic feeds it.
See, that monkey thrives on chaos and emotion. It loves guilt, stress, self-doubt, and loneliness. But it hates calm. It hates confidence. It hates when you smile, breathe, and say, “Not today.” When you do that, its voice cracks, its confidence fades, and eventually, it sulks into silence.
And that’s the secret the people who’ve truly conquered addiction understand:
You never kill the monkey — you just stop giving it bananas.
You live your life with awareness, not fear. You build peace, not panic. You learn that the monkey’s presence is a reminder of where you’ve been — not a threat of where you’re going.
So yes, the monkey might always be there on your shoulder… but these days, you can let it ride quietly, because you’ve tamed it. And every smoke-free, free-thinking day you live, it gets smaller, lighter, and easier to ignore.
In the end, it’s not the monkey that changes — it’s you. ~~Writer unknown
You see, in essence it’s the same lesson as in Seth’s teachings. My advice: don’t be afraid. Change is not always easy, but it’s worth it.
Prague, October 2025, follow-up on an unexpected inspiration.
All images are artificial generated by Dirk Bosman and licensed under Creative Commons BY-NC 4.0
